Oh My God

2011-02-08T17:33:00.001-05:00

Be blarnk (our new word) and vote for Brink of Fame: Actor for Logo's NewNowNext Awards.

2009-09-01T10:26:00.002-04:00

Oh My God! Please check out our new video. It's all the rage and oh so mink (our new word) We worked for 72 hours straight on this masterpiece. Well, we only mopped up venomous snakes and rats throughout the shoot, but it was an honor. Next time, we may actually get to use the same bathroom as this Bollywood star!

2009-08-28T11:23:00.003-04:00

Look of the Week

Oh My God. The new vlant (our new word) look for today is being covered in brown paint. It's so mud-wrestling-chic and can now exist outside of 1800's North American Native times. Just add a Gucci handbag with a pair of gold Greek sandals with a small heel. Pull back your hair then you're ready to show the world just how vlant you can be! We're going to the opening of "Love Happens" with this look. Can't wait to show everything off. So vlant.

2009-08-10T18:36:00.006-04:00

America's Next Top Mall-del

Oh My God. We're pitching a new to show to My Network TV. A show where we search in malls across America to find the most yert (our new word) fashion models. Real models who look like they could be mannequins from The Limited, who we're looking to sponsor. The big prize would be to be featured in the Flagship Limited Store and $5000 cash. We're looking to get Kristy Swanson and Meshach Taylor from Mannequin 2 to be judges since they know a lot about yertness and possibly mannequins.

Are you up for the challenge?

2009-08-07T11:37:00.004-04:00

Bundy Bash!

Oh my god----We are thrilled to report we will be vacationing in the Hamptons this weekend. Well--not really the Hamptons---but Massapequa. We will be Ipod Deejaying at The Bundy Bash. Celebrating the late great himself. And finally we are getting paid! The hosts of the shack are giving us a pair of brand new cinder block shoes! So Slarp! (word of the week) They will not be out until December, great shoes for the Winter. We are honored to wear them.

2009-08-05T12:58:00.007-04:00

The New Country to be Held Hostage

Oh My God. After Bill Clinton rescued Laura Ling and Euna Lee from North Korea, it became yesterday's barnt (our new word) news. The hottest country to be held captive is now the Democratic Republic of the Congo. We're going there next week to bring Starbucks coffee beans to people of the DRotC. Two thirds of the country is malnourished, so it looks like time to start our new Master Cleanse, poppy seeds and non-brita water. Plus, the hot new pet of the week is the Okapi. So not barnt

2009-07-28T10:09:00.004-04:00

Print of the Week

Oh My God. We were in the Cayman Islands at a super dwarnt (our new word) Dunkin Donuts opening. We were iPhone DJing early Canadian pop Alanis and latter secular Amy Grant. We noticed a dwarnt new print in men's wear. We got three pair each in different color schemes and even got two for Meck, our adopted son. We have to say these fashions made quite a splish. So dwarnt.

2009-07-24T11:02:00.004-04:00

Food Trend of the Week

Oh My God. We were in South Albania on Tuesday. We had the most succulent ribs ever. It was so krant (our new word). We had Baby Back Snow Leopard ribs! Never have we had anything so succulent and messy. So krant. The ribs were served with a side of Macaroni and Albanian Goat Cheese with a lightly seasoned kale. Meck just couldn't get enough, he needed to two bibs and he rarely eats human food. This was served with the most dry Pinot Noir. Our teeth were fushia and our stomachs were full. You'd think that this was expensive, but since we opened Albania's first Target, we got our meal for free. We're so krant.

2009-07-23T14:07:00.006-04:00

Song of the Week

Oh My God. This week we have discovered the very Strank (our new word) new artist from East France, Art Sullivan---Take a listen now---We will be mopping up after him all summer long on his tour of East South America. We won't be getting paid in real money, only in nuts, but it is an honor to be working with such a manboy!

2009-07-20T18:32:00.003-04:00

Hair of the Week

Oh My God. This is the most marnt (our new word) shampoo ever and is all over south Malaysia! Sunsilk Shampoo turns everyday hair into real silk! See below. So marnt.

2009-07-17T08:01:00.002-04:00

Dance of the Week

Oh My God. Below are some people doing the flant (our new word) new dance. Often times called the "Step, Touch," we love the ironic statement used here. Doing the dance will the least amount of skill to a song written by Luther Vandross for the Broadway Musical, "The Wiz." These white kids are hilighting the fact that they have no soul, which that is so artitic and flant!

2009-07-16T10:42:00.006-04:00

Emmy Nomination of the Week

Oh My God. The Emmy Award Nominations have been announced today. We're sad to say that our superb make-up job as seriously featured close-up extras on Law and Order: SVU have gone unnoticed. Here are the untek (our new word) nominees for Outstanding Makeup.

Norman T. Leavitt for Grey's Anatomy - ABC

John E. Jackson for Little Britain - HBO

Debbie Zoller for Mad Men - AMC

Eryn Krueger Mekash for Nip/Tuck - FX

Todd A. McIntosh for Pushing Daisies - ABC

No BrYan and Rexxx for Law and Order: SVU - NBC? So untek!

2009-07-08T11:47:00.002-04:00

Trend of the Week

Oh My God. The gloudest (our new word) fashion statement of the week is an aqua-marine burqa. It's sort of taboo in Paris, but it's like wearing handcuffs in the sack with a serial killer, so gloud! It's only permissible if you are rocking a dark plum liquid eye liner and thick mascara. Live out gloud!

2009-07-06T10:43:00.002-04:00

Homage of the Week

Oh My God. This week we noticed a video by Le Colonel Bastard on Youtube. It's so orped (our new word). He is doing an homage to the very orped Iranian-born German perfomer Amos. Whose video "I Can't Stop My Feet" rocked the Oh My God blog a few times. So orped!

2009-07-02T12:16:00.002-04:00

Hot Remix Opportunity

Oh My God. This song is so MrPle (our new word). Rianna needs to get on this hot MrPle song before Diddy gets it. Can someone remix this? So MrPle.

2009-05-01T16:22:00.003-04:00

Hot Flu of the Week

Oh My God. It would seem that Swine Flu is all the rage right now. Plebs are waiting behind velvet ropes as A-List stars are getting a taste of it first. So terb (our new word). For you trendsetters out there, we've discovered an even hotter flu, The Raccoon Flu. It's so exclusive that only animals can get it. How terb. This whole week we've opened our hot East Bronxville (our new chic neighborhood) loft up to a baker's dozen Raccoons. We're keeping our fingers crossed as we're all sharing the same water dish. Totally terb.

2009-04-28T10:05:00.002-04:00

Fashion Trend of the Week

Oh My God. We were iPod DJing at an opening of new target in east South Korea last week. Their fashion is so menq (our new word). We found this great place to get Korean fash and the website is so easy to remember http://stores.ebay.com.au/fashionlearder91. Just rolls off the tounge after having a sip of a jamba. So menq.

2009-04-20T13:02:00.003-04:00

We're Not Gay But...

We think this even is going to be totally bernf (our new word). Hopefully we can pick up some of the losers! By the way, collars up in east Wisconsin.

2008-11-23T12:27:00.003-05:00

Dance Hit of the Week

Oh My God. Sorry we've been away. We've been in West Uganda iPod deejaying. It was so marq (our new word). But here we have our new dance hit of the week. So marq.

2008-03-17T08:19:00.008-04:00

Artist of the Week

Oh My God. We ran across this kank (our new word) new artist. Much to our chagrin he's not even signed. We're working on our own record label called XXX with a Y Records. The artist (which I'm sure some of you know) is RoGeR. The reverb on his voice "Alone" will skyrocket him to stardom. Look how putting your voice into a filter helped out Paula Abdul and Britany Spears! Keep doing your thing RoGeR. Check out the song below!

Alone

2008-03-10T12:45:00.004-04:00

Dance of the Week

Oh My God. The Fast Food Rockers are trying to rival us again. They are trying to serve us, literally. Their hit single, "Fast Food Song" has choreography that will attempt to bump our zeck (our new word) dance craze, "The Mannequin." The Fast Food Rockers have gone corporate and we can't even afford a non-blogspot website. All we can do is ask you to stand strong, still and don't move so the Mannequin can live forever. Kim Catrall, can you back us up? So zeck.

2008-03-06T21:05:00.005-05:00

Pronunciation of the Week

Oh My God. Jillian Lewis has created a new pronunciation this week on the finale of Project Runway last night and we think it's so raught (our new word)! She reauditized RESOLUTION. She pronounced it rEEEEEsolution. So raught. Forget Christian and "Fierce," this is going to be huge. And to think she's from Long Island where it's normally pronounced rezalushen with a big hand gesture. Sorry you didn't win Jillian, but you have a raught new word of your own.

2008-03-05T11:04:00.006-05:00

Artist of the Week

Oh My God. This week we noticed in the mirror scene in Tommy, Ann-Margret decorated her boudoir just like our loft in East Williamsburg (Canarsie). So hepting (our new word). We love her mirror dance, it's not as hepting as the Mannequin which has become a world-wide sensation. The synth-wind effect needs to make a comeback as well. Can we get Jay-Z on that? Check out the video below and remember how hepting good ol' Ann used to be!

2008-02-24T19:20:00.004-05:00

Scary Busey...

Oh My God. Gary Busey just gave Jennifer Garner just got the weirdest kiss on the neck while talking to Ryan Seacrest. So no burpt (our new word.)

2008-02-23T17:40:00.004-05:00

Artist of the Week

Oh My God. A plerb (our new word) artist, Paula Abdul is making a comeback that's bigger than Tab. We're not sure if she's using her voice or the voice of Data from Star Trek: The Next Generation. Either way it is so plerb. In the music video you'll see Randy Jackson from American Idol and Journey fame, playing a bass like the girls from Richard Palmer videos. What a shout out! We were surprised that Simon, Ford and Coke didn't get a shout out in the video. Like Amy Weinhouse, this is a throwback song. A throwback to 2001. Way to give a subtle shout out to 9/11. Paula Abdul is always so controversial. So plerb.

2008-02-18T18:33:00.003-05:00

Gay Face of the Week.

Oh My God. So quirpette (our new word.)

2008-02-18T01:00:00.004-05:00

America's Next Top Let Down

Oh My God. We were turned away from the casting at the cycle 10 of America's Next Top Model. Tyra just turned us away because we're men. That is so not prenkle (our new word). We told her that we would even compete as one person like the awkward ginger twins a few years ago. ANTM needs us, we will be the biggest runway duo to hit Valentino since Tyra's ample tits. We could totally kill in the go sees! We have so much personality and we know Moby. So prenkle.

2008-02-15T13:45:00.008-05:00

Look of the Week

Oh My God. This week ladies go get your haircut and frosted. It needs to be hairpt (our new word). We iPod DJed at an Target opening in Columbus, Ohio and this haircut is all the rage. Ladies you need to get the Markie Post. To accommodate this look you must have the sass or be a quirky public defender. So hairpt. You'll stop traffic with this look. Don't forget to accessorize with your fashion fanny pack and jean jacked. This look is so hairpt.

2008-02-13T16:33:00.003-05:00

Our Love Auction:

Oh My God. We've been weeding through all of the celebutants and we still haven't figured out with whom we should spend our hemt (our new word) Valentine's Day. We really think that we should go out with one of our readers. So hemt. Why don't you add a comment saying how much you would pay to hang out with us. Don't worry, we'll take you the hottest velvet ropes in the city. We used to clean the restrooms in Lotus if that tells you anything. We're hot to trot and so hemt.

2008-02-11T17:09:00.000-05:00

Gospel follows popularity in half-dressed.

Oh My God. Aretha Franklin followed the half-dressed trend that most popstars sport last night at the Grammy Awards. We think that's so bologre (our new word.) But what makes it so fashionable is that it's not the usually vag hanging out, not that we mind because we're not gay, but she chose to show off her bologre sausage link. So bologre.

2008-02-10T23:25:00.000-05:00

Grammy Performance of the Night

Oh My God. Beyonce had the hit performance last night at the Grammys. With great performances from Amy Weinhouse, Kanye West, Alicia Keys, and Foo Fighters, Beyonce was so good, they kept showing it over and over again. It was so klerb (our new word). Check it out below!

2008-02-09T16:37:00.000-05:00

Artist of the Week

Oh My God. The son of the lead singer of the Fine Young Cannibals has started his plerm (our new word) career. We haven't really confirmed that fact, but he looks just like him. The artist's name goes by the name Tristan. It's the singular name popularized by Madonna, Cher and Rumplestitskin. His songs have the c word thrown all over the place and we like that because we're straight. So plerm. Check out the video below, dogs whining makes him smile apparently.

2007-12-21T17:31:00.000-05:00

Look of the Week

Oh My God. Get your carrots out of the crisper everyone and have a feast! We've been on a complete carrot diet for the past month to get the look to the right. It's so carank (our new word.) We're a deep peach color now, but we're going for a nice Burnt Sienna for Christmas morning. If you're looking for any carank Christmas parties, we're going to the 14th street food kitchen. We hear it's exclusive and it's open bar. Happy Holidays. So carank!

2007-10-24T18:39:00.001-04:00

Hair Style of the Week

Oh My God. This week there is a new style in facial hair. The half beard is just skymple (our new word). So men and some ladies take that bic to your right side. If you do your left side that means you're light in your Manolos. So skymple!

2007-10-10T00:25:00.000-04:00

Artist of the Week

Oh My God. We are rarely this inspired. Stacy Hedger is do derng (our new word). Her acting, dancing and trumpet playing definitely make her a triple threat and a force to be reconed with. Watch out Jennifer Preggers Lopez! We decided that spangled sleeves are so derng and the pitch being a little under is just part of her style, have you ever heard Fergie live?

2007-10-06T00:37:00.000-04:00

Kirstie, where are you?

Oh My God. Jenny Craig needs another client...move over Valerie B., Britney looks like she's gained a few since she's lost the kids. Remember when she was so tuy (our new word) and used to see us standing in line at Butter?

2007-09-04T15:34:00.001-04:00

It's an honor!

Oh My God. Mark Ronson, MTV's artist of the Week (not as prestigious as ours) has a music video in honor of our blog! It's so etix (our new word).

2007-09-04T12:59:00.000-04:00

Study With Us

Oh My God. Last night on VH1's "The Pick Up Artist," Mystery sent home Joe W, a very klerb (our new word) fellow from Minnesota. Women usually think he's gay...we totally get that all the time. We're totally straight too, Joe! You should come out to our hot neighborhood and we'll teach you to pick up the ladies. We really haven't picked anyone up since we sold our genitalia last New Year's Eve to get in the VIP treatment at Bed (Mystery can't even get into Bed), but we remember how to get chicks mesmerized. Joe can even stay on our papazan right next to our pet meerkat. So klerb.

2007-09-03T12:08:00.000-04:00

Hot New Pose of the Week

Oh My God. We haven't been posing for pictures lately because we have been working months trying to find a pose to convey bordom and apathy. The paps haven't been nocking down our door lately because we've been so in cognito. We think we've found our new look and it's so yent (our new word). We're going to Butter tomorrow and we're going to use this pose to get in. Hand on chin will be so unexpected. It seems so pedestrian, but with our fashion forward ways it will skyrocket us to superstardom. So yent.

2007-08-03T19:29:00.000-04:00

Hairspray the Movie

Oh My God. Hairspray, the movie has been out for a few weeks. It's been getting glerk (our new word) reviews. A lot of our "friends" have seen this movie and couldn't stop raving about it. We're not sure if our readers have been keeping up with the times...but hairspray is not glerk for the environment. That's why we're making a brand new movie called "Pomade." We're working on a script between Target openings and iPod DJing shifts. It'll be a green movie that is about two struggling wannabe celebutants who can't get into Butter for dinner. To get fame and fortune they start a line of hair care that will hopefully get them on the A List so they can eat next to J.Tim. The movie is going to be a cross between Good Will Hunting, Clueless, Maid in Manhattan, All About Eve, On Thin Ice: The Tai Babilonia Story, Fiddler on the Roof, Eddie Murphy: Raw, Pajama Game, Out of Africa, War of the Roses, My Two Dads and Godfather 2: Attack of the Clones. It's going to be glerk piece of cinematic history!

2007-07-25T18:37:00.000-04:00

Another Throwback Artist.

Oh My God. With the popularity of Amy Weinhouse's throwback album, artists are now following suit. Stewen Anderson is doing just that with his hot track, "Let it Out!" This song is so rapz (our new word.) This number is definitely a throwback to 1994, an era left out in the throwback genre. When the song was over, I was waiting for Ace of Base, like I used to do when we were making rapz mixtapes off the radio. I also felt like Lisa Loeb's career could be resurrected when i listened to that song...when the song was over, I realized so is she. So rapz.

2007-07-20T16:11:00.000-04:00

We don't get a lot of press

Oh My God. We always intimidate the press and it's great when readers praise our blog in other ways. Hillsong Music wrote a song about us called "Wonderful God." We think wonderful is a simple word, perhaps next time you write a song about us, take it to the next level, like ternk (our new word). Everyone in the video has their hands up in the air. This must have filmed below sea level because they reached up to us in NYC. Thanks for reading, Hillsong Music! You are all so ternk...or (sigh) wonderful.

2007-06-19T13:52:00.000-04:00

Hot Pet of the Week

Oh my God, there is a quap (our new word) pet in town that will blow away any toy dog this side of East Maui. That new pet is the darling Cicada. They're so very economical. They don't eat much or require a lot of space and they look great with a pair of red capris. So quap! Plus they shed their out-of-style exoskeleton in the fall, just like us!

2007-06-01T13:14:00.000-04:00

Artist of the Week

Oh My God - have we found a gem for you, he's so hytti (our new word). His name is Yann - not to be confused with yawn. His beats are infectious and oh so hytti! According to his website, "Yann is a citizen of the world, for he grew up traveling the globe, from Paris to New York, Milan to Casablanca." We can totally relate - you never know where you'll find us - East Williamsburg, South Lima, East Afghanistan or where ever a Target is opening.

One of his hytti tracks is "Hunky." Yann is an amazing composer, he found a chic way to make 3 notes sound robotically beguiling. Some of the lyrics are "You keep calling me hot stuff, I know this is just a bluff. I know I can make you horny, You keep calling me hunky" It's like Kerouac, but that hot boxy maidbot, Rosie from the Jetson's saying it from where her heart is programmed. Check out his tracks at www.myspace.com/yannmusic.

2007-05-16T12:58:00.000-04:00

We are on the cutting edge!

Oh My God! On July 20th 2006 we posted our "Artist of the Week," Gunther! He was so qwib (our new word) with his new single Tutti Frutti Summer Love. We've find out recently that super blogger, Perez Hilton has announced him as his favorite on May 2nd 2007. I think this one of the first examples where two hard working paternal straight men who live together in one bedroom apartment in a totally platonic way have found a trend before a gay man. We're just so qwib. Monica Potter, don't worry! You'll blow up a year from now!

2007-05-16T12:47:00.000-04:00

Artist of the Week

Oh My God! This is dedicated to the most unknown celeb in America right now, she is so ruw (our new word). Ladies and Gentleman reacquaint yourself with the multi talented and oh so ruw Monica Potter. You may have seen her most recently on Boston Legal or perhaps Patch Adams. So ruw! But I'm sure you probably have not seen her like this!

2007-04-26T18:39:00.000-04:00

We're on Web Radio

Oh My God. We just entered the world of Web Radio. We're so menkle (our new word). We spent the day on google looking for information about Rosie O'Donnell leaving the View. (We're not gay by the by...) We ran into this blogcast by comedian, Dave Rubin, on The Dave Rubin Show. It's a very menkle show. We show up in the program around 34 minutes into the show. We called to say that baked beans are the hot new weapon, so menkle. We're sending a box of Bush Brother's Baked Beans to Iraq. We want our troops to be in fashion...and boys...collars up! Click here to hear us!

2007-04-22T22:37:00.000-04:00

Dance Double of the Week:

Oh My God. This award goes to former Spice Girl, Geri Halliwell and her limber dance twin. We're currently looking for dance doubles for our tept (our new word) new video, "On The Red Eye." You can always borrow our tept dance move, The Mannequin. Geri, we're just confused that Martha Wash wasn't in the back ground or something. Hasn't she been omitted from enough music videos? Throw her a bone already! Otherwise we put our stamp of approval on this video. So tept, oh and we're not gay.

2007-04-19T18:44:00.000-04:00

She's Got Talent

Oh my god! Sorry we've been off line. We've been waiting for many checks from the multitude of our freelance deejay/fruit polishing/head waxing gigs. We thought Target lost our address! We even sold our adopted son, Meck to hot hollywood couple, John Tesh and Connie Sellica. We still couldn't make ends meet enough to pay our cable internet. But now we're back!

So many people give models a bad rap for only being pretty and just a blerq (our new word) body. Last weekend we were in the VIP lounge at Lotus and we saw the blerq Gisele Bündchen throwing back Stoli O and Red Bulls. We've heard that she does party tricks. So, we egged her on along with Veronica Mars' Jason Dohring. She then said "BrYan, Rexxx and Jason, I'll show you..." or something like that, it was in another language. But low and behold with a blink of an eye she transformed into an Impala or a Deer and ran out the door! Who knew she had so much talent with her mutant power! Gisele, you'll always be blerq in our eyes!

2007-03-12T20:24:00.000-04:00

Artist of the week

Oh my god - this young lady, Nikole Marie Music came into contact with us from Myspace. Her sounds are very hunph (our new word) and she seems like a perfectly lovely girl. She looks like the woman who works at the tanning salon next to Target in East Hanover mall in central Pennsylvania. Her first song she states she is dangerous, from our perspective it looks like her tan maybe dangerous. Please see your dermo stat. But seriously - we're looking for a surrogate breast feeder for our adopted son, Meck. Let us know if you're interested. One of your other tracks is entitled Selfish, so maybe you won't. For less information about her, check out her website at nikolemarie.com.

2007-03-11T11:26:00.000-04:00

Our Future Hit Single:

Oh My God - we're releasing our memph (our new word) single to the world. Our producer told us to go a little more urban. It's called "You a Joke." Keep your eyes on VH1's artists you ought to know. I'm sure we'll be there soon. Below is a bootleg from one of our many memph shows.

You a Joke

Add to My Profile More Videos

2007-02-12T18:31:00.000-05:00

What about bryanandrex.blogspot.com?

Oh My God - The Dlist sounds totally deet (our new word), but aren't BrYan with a Y and Rexxx the hottest guys on the web? I know we sold our genitalia to get into BED on New Year's Eve, but still. We're guys who party, have a blog, will make appearances for free and we COULD be on the radio, but our faces are too deet. Beyond that, we are world travelers that educate people on fashion, style and pretension. Dan Savage, that is so not deet. Is it because we're not gay like Anderson Cooper? He wants a family, just like us. Have you not seen our adopted heinous charity child, Meck? He's the most fashionable baby right now next to Suri. Ugly babies are so deet. We implore you Mr. Savage to change your words. But if you don't, we won't need you anyway because we're on the A List.

2007-02-05T18:45:00.000-05:00

Myspace Message of the Week:
Oh My God- today (VK:)Todd, from myspace, wrote us a message:

(VK:)TODD: Your Cute. (With the grammatical error.)

BrYan and Rexxx: Thanks, mystery pic.

(VK:) TODD: Your Welcome is your dick big (With the grammatical error and no punctuation.)

How do we answer that to a person who is so afraid to show his face on the internet? So not plert (our new word). To answer your question, we sold our genitalia to get into the VIP section of BED, a hot club in NYC on New Year's Eve. One day we'll be able to afford replacement parts. We'll let you know how big they are whenever we acquire it - at least you'll know they'll be plert.

2007-02-01T18:28:00.000-05:00

Artist of the Week

Oh My God. The German pop band, Die Prinzen is our artist of the with their melph (our new word) video, Mein Fahrrad (My Bike)! Since Queen, there hasn't been a bike song that even comes close to comparison. What's great about them, is they're leading the pack of subjectively unattactive front men. He looks like a cross between a fraggle and George Castanza's mother on Seinfeld. So melph! The message seems clear, although we don't speak a lick of German, is that corpulent singers need to exersise or nicolerichie to get better production values and a huge record deal. This is a fantastic message for those beastly children out there with subpar voices and should be shared with all. So melph.

2007-01-30T17:33:00.000-05:00

UNICEF is Doing Great Things

Oh My God - UNICEF is the world's child survival authority. It's so teyep (our new word). UNICEF is helping kids in over 150 countries and territories and made Clay Aiken cut his hair...finally. We thought the Laura Bush quaff was so unteyep. Oh yeah, and we're not gay.

2007-01-29T12:52:00.000-05:00

A Duvet Don't
Oh My God - do not buy a duvet from Pottery Barn. They are so not relp (our new word.) We went shopping this weekend and the staff would not help us find a bassinette for our darling adorably heinous adopted son, Meck. They just ignored us and cattily whispered about our trio. PLUS, we couldn't find anything to match his Andy Warhol print of Dudley Moore, so not relp. To top things off, they denied us a Pottery Barn credit card when we bought pussy willows to spray paint orange to match our neo-futuristic-post-nuclear-blasted-Shel-Silverstein foyer/kitchen nook. So bua.

2007-01-08T00:44:00.000-05:00

Myspace quote of the day:

From this gentleman named, I ShAkE iT LiKe JeLLo MaKe ThE BoYz SaY HeLLo

"don't hate me cuz im beautyful hate me cuz ur man think so"

2007-01-08T00:43:00.000-05:00

Collar Alert:

COLLARS UP IN DARFUR!
stay tuned for up-to-the-minute collar coverage only on Oh My God.

2006-12-08T17:58:00.000-05:00

Don't Come A-Knockin'

This is an open letter to Lance Bass,

I know we are so xeft (our new word), but don't think you can make us your rebound boyz. Your break up with Reichen must be difficult, but if you read any of posts on our blog you would know that we are 100% straight. We do live together with our adopted son Meck, but that doesn't make us gay (And Perez - you better not say ANYTHING!) We cannot offer any type of comfort you need, go to the Boyz Room and watch the Go Go Idol contest and get an ironic make out with the East Village's finest gays.

2006-12-08T17:26:00.000-05:00

Our new BFF of the week:

Hey everyone meet Brenda Barnes, our yerkest (our new word) best friend. She's CEO and President of Sara Lee. We met her at a yerk party on the LES. We were cater waiting and Brenda took a liking to us because we kept "bringing the Bellinis!" We told her we were so impressed with her footware and she took us to her house! Well, we said that we housekeep on the side, but still so yerk. We told her about how we shined Moby's shoes while he was on tour and she just had to hire us. We drank Van Gogh Martinis and ate East Bolivian yak cheese together...I mean she was asleep while we were supposed to be scrubbing her bathroom tile, but still, we were under the same roof! See you next Wednesday Brenda!

2006-12-04T12:50:00.000-05:00

Collar Alert:

COLLARS UP IF YOU SMELL LIKE TEEN SPIRIT!
stay tuned for up-to-the-minute collar coverage only on Oh My God.

2006-12-04T12:37:00.000-05:00

Celeb Product of the Week:

We are huge supporters of the product. It's so plart (our new word). Just because we don't want to see a gal's gaping hole of desire doesn't mean we're gay. Here, here Miss Manners!

2006-11-18T11:34:00.000-05:00

A fair trade:

Hey there folks - we are ready to give away all of our fashion tips and a weekend with us for a fair trade: new betrank (our new word) Playstation 3. We need to sell it over seas so we can get our heinous adopted son, Meck a new face. Ever since we've seen how adorable Suri has turned out, we need to put Meck back in the running. We'd like to get him a nice Linda Evangelista. We've seen the movie Face Off, we know it's possible.

Before and After

2006-11-13T14:09:00.000-05:00

Artists of the Week:

The VinylShakerz covered the Murray Head hit "One Night in Bangkok." Their cover is so komd (our new word!). This music video is a window to the night light of BrYan and Rexxx. We've spent many a night in South Thailand drinking with crowds of ladies clamoring to catch a glimpse of us! Here, here VinylShakerz! So komd.

2006-11-10T18:40:00.000-05:00

Saturday November 11th at BoysRoom!

We're on the silverscreen again at BoysRoom in the east village. You can see us in Lola Rock'n'Rolla's "Night of the Living Gay!" Just a reminder we're not gay, we are serious actors. We took one class at HB Studios and we can act gay. The film is so merk (our new word.) BoysRoom: 211 Ave A (13th St), NYC

2006-11-10T18:37:00.000-05:00

A Gentle Reminder:

That we are straight. I know that fingers are pointing our way again. We live together and have an adopted child. Meck is a beautiful baby that requires two straight parents. He didn't have a father, now we must over-compensate. It's just so blark (our new word.).

2006-10-31T12:57:00.000-05:00

Tonight BrYan and Rexxx are on the silver screen!

2006-10-27T10:10:00.000-04:00

TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT!

2006-10-24T13:36:00.000-04:00

Election Trend:

Avoiding plastic surgery is the barnk (our new word) thing to do. Hillary didn't do it, so why should you? Let's all look like this. To your right is a projected picture of Sissy Spacek if she doesn't get work done.

2006-10-19T13:32:00.000-04:00

Update: Our show is at 9pm tonight! Skip Grey's Anatomy!

2006-10-19T13:24:00.000-04:00

Myspace Profile of the Week!

Hello everyone! Meet our plattest (our new word) fresh friend. Her name is Asian Pie. She has free webcam shows. We think they must be like our free weekly show at Mo Pitkin's about fashion, style and celebrity! We're too busy to catch them - we've been sweeping Tower records for all the deals for our Target India Tour. Look at her outfit. So platt. Thongs and Arms are so hot in Asia right now. It's great to connect with other performers like us on myspace. So professional. Check her out!

2006-10-12T15:49:00.000-04:00

Just another reminder:

That we're are so not gay. We support breast cancer awareness because Rexxx has double A implants, but we're completely remeblin (our new word) heterosexuals on the prowl for some sweet kisses from some remeblin ladies. Check out our show tonight at 8p at Mo Pitkins!

2006-10-09T01:25:00.000-04:00

2006-10-05T13:09:00.000-04:00

Accessory of the Week

Having the sniffles never looked so good. This fall, the common cold is the benkest (our new word) thing to hit the streets. Everyone is getting them. We're been carrying our Louis hanky everywhere just waiting for a little run of the nose to show off our chops. We're going to start licking water fountains if out bodies get rid of the one we have now. So benk! Having a cold makes you sexually unattainable and therefore more desirable to the opposite sex (just a reminder: we're not gay). So go out there stop taking your vitamins, quit sleeping and walk through an infested elementary school then hope for the best.

2006-09-28T13:42:00.000-04:00

Collar Alert:

COLLARS DOWN IN SOUTH BRAZIL AND UP IN THAILAND!
stay tuned for up-to-the-minute collar coverage only on Oh My God.

2006-09-22T13:12:00.000-04:00

Just a reminder:

That we're not gay. We're just berft (our new word).

2006-09-19T12:21:00.000-04:00

We're Rich!
We didn't even play the lotto, but we're winners! We're so werght (our new word). Mr. HANS DOUGLAS, who capitalizes his name for some reason and makes several typos, wrote us a message stating that our e-mail address is connected to some winning numbers! Sounds official, no? So werght? I think all we have to do is give him all of our private financial information and we're set! The first thing we're going to do with our winnings is give our adopted son, Meck, a new face, since ugly babies we're werght a month ago. We've decided to give him the face of Linda Evangelista. We can't wait for the check so our heinous Meck can feel like a supermodel! Thanks Hans Douglas!

2006-09-09T12:45:00.000-04:00

Artists of the Week:

When we were in south Prague opening a Wendy's we bumped into the trankest (our new word) new group, The West End Girls. These girls combine the world of construction and an unimaginative look into pop music that we just adore. It's so trank. In both of their videos they are sporting about 410 yards of pleather (it's making a come back) and use cardboard cut outs. An elementary school teacher must have done the set design - we're definitely using their designer for our video, "On the Red Eye." They whisper sing, which is so trank because Janet Jackson is back again. Check out their video below and check out their website www.westendgirls.se.

2006-09-09T10:38:00.000-04:00

Fashion File:

Japan Fashion Week was held last week and it was so ferk (our new word)! Designer Kazuo Takashima had his models wear shoes on their heads, which proves something, walking on your head in the rain can finally happen! Takashima has finally provided the correct street wear perfect for circus folks in monsoon season, it's the new ferk thing. Get yourself into that hot yoga class stat!

2006-09-06T12:36:00.000-04:00

Baby Up For Adoption:

In July we reported that baby Suri must be heinous since she hasn't been revealed. (Read more about that post...) So we went out and adopted our aesthetically challenged child, Meck, which was so frenk (our new word) at the time. As you see, Suri is as cute as a baby doll. Some days you're frenk, some days you're not. We need to give Meck back because we don't want him to clash with our style. Does anyone want him? Should we put an ad on Craigslist? He's really quiet. He doesn't eat much and but loves to drink battery acid. He doesn't have any hair, so you'll save Johnson & Johnson Baby Shampoo costs. Please give this precious child a home.

Our Meck can now be yours!

2006-09-05T12:53:00.000-04:00

Stealing the Thunder:

Shame on you Fergie! Fergie, formerly known for being the vag from the Black Eyed Peas has released her new song "London Bridge." This is after she met us greeting people at a Target opening in LA in the fall. We told her we're getting ready to release our flenk (our new word) new song "Mary Had a Little Little Lamb (Her Fleece Was White After Labor Day, YUCK!)" How dare you steal our thunder. It's so not flenk. We're not buying your album unless you get us on the list at Soho House.

2006-09-05T12:45:00.000-04:00

Reminder:

Rosie O'Donnell has joined the cast of the view today. We think it's really merk (our new word.) Her new haircut is tre merk too. We just want to remind you all that we're not gay. We would do any of those girls on that stage on the View. Behar - watch out! Rosie, we'll send flowers too since you got Tom's!

2006-08-31T18:53:00.000-04:00

Accessory of the Day:

Self-absorbed babble is the miquest (our new word) thing! Throw out your Louis, your Coach and your Fendi. Just assume that people want to hear every boring detail of your life. As long as you're confident about it - people will listen and find you so mique!

2006-08-27T21:16:00.000-04:00

Collar Alert:

COLLARS DOWN UNLESS YOU WON AN EMMY AWARD!
stay turned for up-to-the-minute collar coverage only on Oh My God.

2006-08-24T19:34:00.000-04:00

Collar Alert:

COLLARS UP EVERYWHERE EXCEPT PLUTO!
stay turned for up-to-the-minute collar coverage only on Oh My God.

2006-08-24T00:00:00.000-04:00

Accessory of the Day

There is a new controversial accessory out there. It's so yurp (our new word) that you can't get it at any store. Paris has been waiting for it for years! The yurpest new thing is a great personality. We were at a hot party in Santa Monica. We didn't get in - we just waited outside greeting everyone waiting for Moby. Camryn Mainheim totally talked to us before she made a b-line to the rosemary and olive oil Trisquits. She said we were fabulous and sort of laughed in our faces when we told her "collars up," but she was yurp none the less. We hope Meck, our adopted child, will grow up one day to be just like her. Sweet and very yurp.

2006-08-23T23:27:00.000-04:00

We've been on vacation...

We apologize that we haven't been posting. The three of us (BrYan, Rex and Meck, our fashionably unattractive adopted child ala the mysterious and most likely heinous Suri Cruise) went on vacation to east Istanbul. Unfortunately, it wasn't so herk (our new word). The Turkish government took one look at Meck and mistook him for an illegal alien...like an ALIEN alien. They threw us in the slammer quicker than you could say kebob. We were beaten, questioned and raped. We did not enjoy being raped by the ravage muscular Turkish beefcakes in those seemingly unsanitary unattended shower rooms. We weren't the only ones prodded - poor Meck was being tested and probed to see if he was actually human. How dare they - he's most definitely horrificly unattractive, but you can see that he's human. Just look into those black eyes. Now we're back and it's herk to have your collars up!

2006-08-14T19:18:00.000-04:00

Myspace Page of the Week

Oh My God - we've decided to start featuring ulp (our new word) myspace pages that embody the essance of BrYan and Rex. Here is our first page. Meet "F*ck Me, I'm Paris." FMIP is the ulpest thing on myspace. Here are some of his goals. He's 19 years old and he's very P. Hil meets Grieco.

* Get a Job
* Get BellyButton Pierced
* Get a Car
* Graduate From High School
* Go To College
* Get A Job
* Become Successful in whatever I Do
* Get a Apartment Suite on the Top Floor
* Get Married to my "One"
* (Possibly Adpot A Child)
* Live in Europe
* Drive a Vouge (2004 Range Rover)
* Meet Britney Spears
* Find Mr. Right
* Move out of Aspen
* Go to World Music Awards in Monte Carlo w/ my aunt next summer)
* Live life freely

This is how we should live life, no? He's 19 years old and is trying to graduate High School - We took an extra year to get prom kings, alas to no avail. We're pulling for you, FMIP! He has get a job twice but no "Meet BrYan and Rex" on the list - but we'll let that slide. Check out his page. http://www.myspace.com/fashionboi

2006-08-13T23:58:00.000-04:00

For Those Nay Sayers...

A week or so ago we talked about the hottest thing to hit the clubs, Cassette DJing. To our "friends" who don't thing think it's the terpest (our new word)thing ever, you need to check out this terp video from Denmark. We met them in a Whole Foods while waxing nuts (our part time job). They were looking for McDonalds and Elvis magnets, but we let them in the right direction, Arby's and Moby. So terp. They showed us their video where they also cassette dj. We're all so very turp.

2006-08-08T20:32:00.000-04:00

Diet Alert:

This is the yemptest (our new word) diet to hit the scene. The Pepto Plan, it's so yempt. The diet is as follows:

A Tablet for Breakfast.
3 Tablets for lunch and a tall glass of Pepto liquid.
A chilled bottle of Pepto and a turnip.

We've lost 13 pounds and occationally our consciousness. Paris should try it because we've only excreted in pink. So yempt.

2006-08-08T20:27:00.000-04:00

Collar Alert:

COLLARS DOWN IN CALIFORNIA!
stay turned for up-to-the-minute collar coverage only on Oh My God.

2006-08-02T13:29:00.000-04:00

Choreography Challenge part III:

It looks like there is another submission to our choreography challenge. It's now an all out war between yours truly, The Fast Food Rockers, The Harrison County High School Show Choir and now we have a new submission from a South Korean Pre-School. They attached this letter to their submission. Dear Bryan and Rex, We would like to be part of the challenge. We've seen your performance of the 'Mannequin' a few weeks ago. You have good technique but the concept is too trite. The Fast Food Rockers are savagely unskilled and it's apparent that Harrison County is in a serious talent drought. Please accept our submission and eat it, sh*t face! We were a little thrown off by this, but they do have a telp (our new word) tape.

Don't forget our telp dance:

2006-08-01T12:51:00.000-04:00

Trend Alert:

While we were in west remote Indonesia this past weekend, we couldn't report the ferchest (our new word) trends out there. We didn't have internet access or service to our T-Mobile Sidekick. We had to get the people dancing and there was no plug for our 4 different iPods. We ended up cassette spinning for a crowd of twenties. It was so ferch. We also performed a 30 minute scene from Turner and Hooch. The crowd was so blown away they started throwing us drinks on stage. FREE drinks, it was so ferch. They probably didn't know that they would spill all over us and give us bruises. Nevertheless, bust out your cassettes for your next DJ gig. It's so ferch.

2006-08-01T12:46:00.000-04:00

Collar Alert:

COLLARS UP EVERYWHERE*!
stay turned for up-to-the-minute collar coverage only on Oh My God.

*except in Belgrade.

2006-07-27T12:37:00.000-04:00

We're so influential!

Oh My God! About a week ago we made Gunther our blaert (our new word) artist of the week. We're absolutely sure the web traffic must have skyrocketed. We also assume that Samantha Fox must have caught wind of our pick of the week and recorded a song and video in a weeks time. You know once you see it on our blog - things just blow up. It's soooo blaert! She covered her blaertest hit song, "Touch Me" with this hot swede rocker. Sam, we know you're reading this...we're going to spin that hot track at the opening of a Target in Akron, Ohio next weekend. Why don't you stop by? Check out the video below.

We also found a picture of Gunther from his high school year book. He was so blaert back then too...same exact fashion statement.

2006-07-26T21:01:00.000-04:00

Retro Fashion
The fashion forward Carolyn Castiglia introduced her clepht (our new word at 5:50p) space age silver jacket in May '06. We applauded this fashion statement and told all of our friends in south Chile about this. You can imagine our shock when Carolyn showed up to our show in June '06 wearing the same jacket! Appalling! Not because it was June - because copper was the denk (our word then) trend of that moment. Carolyn, try to keep up with what metallic fabrics are in for each week or even day. If we weren't so busy traveling, spinning and waxing nuts we'd totally help you. Next time text us on our T-Mobile Sidekick before you leave the house (or do our show).

2006-07-26T15:22:00.000-04:00

Straight Alert:

According to People Magazing Online, Lance Bass is gay. Lance may think this is really klemp (our new word), but he's blowing the cover for many other pop stars out there. Not us of course, we are 100% ungay and love the company of women, fashion, shirtless men and klemp modern antiques like Joan Osborne albums. Although we live together with our adopted child Meck in Canarsie or east Billyburg as we like to call it, that doesn't mean we're any different from the popular sitcom Bosom Buddies. Those guys were straight and we mean STRAIGHT. We're not gay. Anne Colter accepts us for who we are and we don't want to ruin our relationship with Fox News because they throw the klempest parties. You better jump back in and say it was a joke - or we'll make sure you never get into any velvet rope clubs in west Prague. Remember when you were straight in that bua movie "On the Line." klemp times right? We don't want our sexuality questioned constantly - don't be a bad Bass!

2006-07-26T12:34:00.000-04:00

Collar Alert:

COLLARS UP in CT, PA, AK and Detroit ONLY!
stay turned for up-to-the-minute collar coverage only on Oh My God.

2006-07-25T20:12:00.001-04:00

Choreography Challenge part II

If you refer to the post added yesterday, the Fast Food Rockers challenged us to a dance off. It's caused a stir in the dance community into an all out dance war! Other dancers are getting involved. The Harrison County High School has sent in their submission video to beat us all. They attached this message: Dear Bryan, Rex and the Fast Food Rockers, We can solve this dispute. We will out dance you any time, any place, any town. Name the location and the time and we'll kick ball change your heads in. Love in Christ, The Harrison County High School Show Choir. These bua jokers haven't even seen the Mannequin. Check out their submission below.

vs.

You be the judge.

2006-07-25T13:43:00.000-04:00

Trend Alert!

While we were spinning hot euro house in a corn field near Kutztown, PA. We spotted the rewest (our new word) trend that is going to sweep the nation: White Bonnets. Get your hands on them before the Hiltonanistondiaz crowd claims it. Show the world how fashion savvy you claim to be. Be fashion forward. Santino will have it on the runway faster than you can say bua!