Scary Busey...

Oh My God. Gary Busey just gave Jennifer Garner just got the weirdest kiss on the neck while talking to Ryan Seacrest. So no burpt (our new word.)

Artist of the Week

Oh My God. A plerb (our new word) artist, Paula Abdul is making a comeback that's bigger than Tab. We're not sure if she's using her voice or the voice of Data from Star Trek: The Next Generation. Either way it is so plerb. In the music video you'll see Randy Jackson from American Idol and Journey fame, playing a bass like the girls from Richard Palmer videos. What a shout out! We were surprised that Simon, Ford and Coke didn't get a shout out in the video. Like Amy Weinhouse, this is a throwback song. A throwback to 2001. Way to give a subtle shout out to 9/11. Paula Abdul is always so controversial. So plerb.

Gay Face of the Week.

Oh My God. So quirpette (our new word.)

America's Next Top Let Down

Oh My God. We were turned away from the casting at the cycle 10 of America's Next Top Model. Tyra just turned us away because we're men. That is so not prenkle (our new word). We told her that we would even compete as one person like the awkward ginger twins a few years ago. ANTM needs us, we will be the biggest runway duo to hit Valentino since Tyra's ample tits. We could totally kill in the go sees! We have so much personality and we know Moby. So prenkle.

Look of the Week

Oh My God. This week ladies go get your haircut and frosted. It needs to be hairpt (our new word). We iPod DJed at an Target opening in Columbus, Ohio and this haircut is all the rage. Ladies you need to get the Markie Post. To accommodate this look you must have the sass or be a quirky public defender. So hairpt. You'll stop traffic with this look. Don't forget to accessorize with your fashion fanny pack and jean jacked. This look is so hairpt.

Our Love Auction:

Oh My God. We've been weeding through all of the celebutants and we still haven't figured out with whom we should spend our hemt (our new word) Valentine's Day. We really think that we should go out with one of our readers. So hemt. Why don't you add a comment saying how much you would pay to hang out with us. Don't worry, we'll take you the hottest velvet ropes in the city. We used to clean the restrooms in Lotus if that tells you anything. We're hot to trot and so hemt.

Gospel follows popularity in half-dressed.

Oh My God. Aretha Franklin followed the half-dressed trend that most popstars sport last night at the Grammy Awards. We think that's so bologre (our new word.) But what makes it so fashionable is that it's not the usually vag hanging out, not that we mind because we're not gay, but she chose to show off her bologre sausage link. So bologre.

Grammy Performance of the Night

Oh My God. Beyonce had the hit performance last night at the Grammys. With great performances from Amy Weinhouse, Kanye West, Alicia Keys, and Foo Fighters, Beyonce was so good, they kept showing it over and over again. It was so klerb (our new word). Check it out below!

Artist of the Week

Oh My God. The son of the lead singer of the Fine Young Cannibals has started his plerm (our new word) career. We haven't really confirmed that fact, but he looks just like him. The artist's name goes by the name Tristan. It's the singular name popularized by Madonna, Cher and Rumplestitskin. His songs have the c word thrown all over the place and we like that because we're straight. So plerm. Check out the video below, dogs whining makes him smile apparently.